GIRLS WITH GUNS/& Slam review

Liberians for democracy & reconciliation (aka the black diamonds)



Tis a fetish of mine,

I confess, it is true,

to collect pictures of girls with guns.

You may say its perverse,

but they fascinate me,

Yes,it’s really just good

harmless fun.

 girl with gun detail

And they gave me this brilliant idea; my Friends,

Let’s give all the Weapons to Women!

Yeah all of the bombs and all of the guns

lets give them all that we’ve got!

All of the tasers and landmines,

let’s give them the whole bleeding lot!

girl with gun detail

Give the Guns to the Girls!

This isn’t a joke,

and we’ll pass lots of laws,

that ban weapons & wars

from being the business of Blokes.

girl with gun detail

Well, don’t ask me

what the future would be

or the fate of the mad human race.

But if you try my idea

I will guarantee

that the World would be a far

quieter place.

 girl with gun detail

And it’s a small price to pay

if once a month for a day

or so, we men have to lay low,

And watch what we say,

coz you Girls are Great, hey!

But nobody’s perfect,

you know?

chinese red guardettes

female rev guard Tehran

police pussies

You can see the Reverend deliver this fine poem at the following locvation.




Cultural Review: Speed Poets Slam

Sunday 5th, 2010; The Inspire Gallery

Regular members of my congregation, familiar with my general disinterest in the Slam format, might wonder why I entered the esteemed Speed Poets annual Slam. In fact, I wasn’t so much interested in competing as I was interested in airing my latest poem,

Girls with Guns“. I had just written it that morning and I was brimming with enthusiasim. I must find an audience! So I put on my dog collar and hied me to the West End Inspire Gallery, where I took up residence in my usual corner at the bar.

The place was packed with a laid back and supportive crowd and some thirty two poets were vying for the hundred dollar prize (shows you how poverty stricken we poets are).

An apt hat is the mark of a committed poet and there was a good range of individualistic headgear on display, from my own snappy Fedora to the classic Akubra on a poet who appeared to be channeling the spirit of Bob a particularly battered pith helmet.

Sadly I didn’t take notes, and I’ve got to say not a lot of the poetry that day has made an impression on my memory, so I’m only reporting what stood out for me.

The standout poem I felt, had to be young Daniel from ZZZ‘s hilarious reminiscinces of his days as a teen goth on the Gold Coast.

Also entertaining was a young lass in a summery frock from Darwin (sorry, didn’t get your name dear) who assured us she was a cigarette and dared us to inhale.

Holy mad poet Savanu  lying flat on his back on the stage, took us stargazing in Nimbin with him. Yeay And the spleadours of the sky were laid before us.

Feature poet, the pith helmet clad Randall Stephens took us deep into the Jurassic swamps with his inspired piece on Dinosaurs. Channeling the spirit not of Bob Katter but a long dead Diplodocus, he gloried in his ability to produce a ton of shit a today.

Really got you thinking.

Soon enough it was time for me to perform Girls with Guns. It seemed to go down well with the audience; they laughed at all the jokes and the applause afterwards felt genuine rather than merely polite.

I hung around awhile and chatted for awhile. Mr Sheish Money rendered a superb version of a Morphine song to my delight. I cadged a drink on tic from the bar staff, then took off for home before a winner was announced. Somebody won. Maybe it was me. If you really want to know the results you could try checking Graham Nunn‘s blog, Lost Shark.

And a fine time twas had by all though I really must remember to take notes.


The Reverend Hellfire is a practising performance poet and an ordained Minister of the Church of Spiritual Humanists.



~ by reverendhellfire on September 12, 2010.

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