Seeing how its Easter (and according to my “Simpsons” calender also Buddha‘s birthday, {Best Wishes!}) I was going to do a Sermon about God. But Saturday Night I got drunk on French Wine with my “brains trust”,  so instead here’s an old poem about Chaos. We’ll get back to God next week.



“Don’t you ever clean up around here?”

Said my Mother,

when She came around for a visit.

I couldn’t understand it.

Everything was in its place.

The bottles still lay where they fell

and the cigarettes were waiting,

right where I’d left them,

faithful as an obediant dog.

The papers had taken awhile

to decide where it was

that they wanted to go,

but settled at last in the corner

where the wind wouldn’t bother them so..


“It is a human characteristic,”

I replied, all pompous,

“To impose Order

Upon Chaos.

We just can’t help it.

Stare at any meaningless arrangement

of random points for long enough

and structure will appear,

and if you can’t see the pattern here,

Mother dear,

then your not looking at it right.

Even Chaos has its rules

and follows them meticulous

as an obsessive housewife.


Yes even Chaos has its rules

and follows them meticulous

as an hallucinating spider.


*Authors note: I changed the words “neurotic spider” to “hallucinating spider” cos I kept thinking of those pictures from the 1960’s of these webs that spiders wove after they’d been fed different types of drug, eg., caffeine, LSD, speed,etc. I liked the “mescaline web” best.



The Reverend Hellfire is a practising Performance Poet and an ordained Minister of the Church of Spiritual Humanists AND the Church of the Universe.

He’s the Uncle your family never speaks about.



~ by reverendhellfire on April 8, 2012.

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