There were many worthy themes available for Sunday Sermons to pursue this week; the Government has removed codeine from the shelves as part of their

visionary program to inflict more pain on the Australian Public, the long awaited sequel, “The Great Magician Part 2” still yearns to be Complete (much as a Magicians’ Assistant who’s been sawn in half but not yet re-joined might yearn for closure), not to mention last week’s Big Asteroid that nearly destroyed us all, etc  etc et al. But at the end of the day, we just couldn’t resist having a kick at Barnaby while he’s down.



It’s been a great week for train-crash ghouls
and rubber-neckers this week,as the spectacular disaster
that is Deputy Prime Minister and National Party Leader Barnaby Joyce’s political disintegration, continues to provide entertainment in glorious, slow motion techni-colour and 5.1 surround sound.
Even your humble narrator must confess to a certain amount of Schaden Freude at seeing this ignorant, red-neck bully and blusterer get a bit of come-uppance after enduring years of soundbites of his self-serving bullshit.

Curiously, whilst they are no doubt indulging in a bit of off-stage gloating, the ALP Opposition have opted to go soft on “Barnyard’s” philandering and hypocrisy. Rather than roasting him on any of the questionable aspects of this sexual relationship with a now-pregnant office staffer 20 years younger than himself, they have focused on a narrow legalistic approach, merely scrutinising the books to see if any of this was carried on at Public Expense. Meantime they make sanctimonious mutterings about the sanctity of Politicians’ Private Lives and isn’t it terrible how intrusive the media is these days?

The suspicion of course arises that they have their own skeletons in the cupboard which they are not keen to see set rattling by a gust of fresh air or general inquiry.

noted Labor Party root-rats

Indeed, the Labor Party have long had form in this regard. Bob Hawke was a noted root-rat in his day, while the Cairns/Morosi affair ended that particular Deputy Prime Minister’s career trajectory in spectacular fashion. Colourful Al Grassby managed to keep his Mistress of 26 years, Angela Chan, out of the papers until his funeral, whilst Senator Evans’ seduction & destruction of Cheryl Kernot is still the stuff of legend where-ever ALP staffers gather.
However, I myself have no such constraints as, in this regard at least, my conscience is clear. So, “Barnyard”..maaate. Let me put a few things to you:

If for years it suits your purpose to use your happy-smiling-family as a political prop, utilising them incessantly in electoral material and Photo Opportunities so you can promote an image of yourself as “Mr Family Man” for political gain, well then, mate, you can’t cry for “Privacy” or cop out with a “Personal Issue” plea when your carefully-constructed-for-public-consumption Image starts to crack and crumble under the harsh weight of sordid, seedy Reality.
If you’re going to push yourself as “Mr Traditional Family Values” or “Mr Sanctity of Marriage” and seek to lay down the Law as a Moral Arbiter of other people’s relationships, then you shouldn’t be surprised when the Public start taking an interest in your own failure to live up to your loudly professed Moral Code..

if only I’d kept my dick in my pants

If you’re posing as a paragon of moral virtue and occupying a senior Government position and start an adulterous affair (that’s what they call it in your religion) with one of your office underlings, breaking those oh so important “marriage vows”, then that is a matter of Public Interest.
It is especially a matter of Public Interest when your extra-marital affair becomes so disruptive to the workings of your Publicly Funded Office that staff resign or find themselves forced to take sides.
When you apparently use your influence to have a colleague create a $191,000 paid-for-by-the-Public position for your girlfriend (a job which did not exist before and disappeared after her tenure) then that is rightly a matter of Public Interest.
It’s a matter of Public Concern when it appears a ministerial shuffle of colleagues was used as an opportunity to punish those who disapproved of your extra-marital activities.

When you shack up with your girlfriend in a rent-free luxury apartment gifted to you by a Business (Transport & Property) “mate” when you say you’re staying with your sister because of the tragic break-up of your marriage, then it’s a matter of Public Interest.
If you seek to hide these facts or delay their becoming public knowledge before  an important by-election takes place, in the hope of minimising the political impact of those revelations so you can perpetuate your political career for another three years and continue propping up an increasingly shaky government, then that becomes a matter of Public Concern.
The secrecy and dishonesty with which these clandestine relationships are pursued are a matter for Public disdain. This is not about the personal problems of a hapless politician, or an innocent “Office Romance”, this is about People in Power living by one set of standards, while hypocritically preaching another.



The Reverend Hellfire is a practised Performance Poet,

President of the Kurilpa Institute of Creativity Inc.,

and an Ordained Minister of the Church of Spiritual Humanism

AND the Church of the Universe.

“Oh the brave sound of a distant drum!”



~ by reverendhellfire on February 11, 2018.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: