It’s the the Korean Nuclear Nightmare, Baby!


Or; How I learned to stop Worrying

and love Kim Jong’s Bomb.

The time has come, dear reader, to say a few words on the whole, “North Korea nuclear missile crisis” (ho hum)

that supposedly we’re all so concerned about.

Frankly, I don’t see what the fuss is about.

America already has hundreds of IBMs pointed at every conceivable threat, rival, challenge or disputed zone you could think of. Traditional Cold War rival Russia likewise has enough nuclear weapons to wipe out what we fondly like to think of as, “Life as we know it”.

Britain naturally has it’s own personal stash of death dealing doo-hickeys, (no show without Punch) as does France, while both India and Pakistan each have a sizeable assortment of nuclear missiles, mostly pointed at each other, but I’m sure India has a few spare to send China’s way should they get too pushy about that whole north-east border squabble. China itself is well equipped to return the favour, and while no-one is certain exactly how many nuclear devices Israel has, it’s a fairly safe bet to assume that they have the ability to wipe out anything, anytime, between Damascus and Kandahar at the push of a button.

I may have missed someone out, but you get the general idea. The world is awash with nuclear “deterrents“(cough) and now we’re supposed to be all concerned because North Korea has slapped something together in the shed out the back?!

It’s hard to escape the conclusion that the real concern of the American state is that their ability to threaten, bully and intimidate North Korea would be severely undercut by that nation’s development of nuclear weapons.

Western political leaders and media in the main are keen to foster impressions that North Korea is a paranoid rogue state run by a crazy madman who may lash out on a whim, so we should all be very scared and maybe even launch a pre-emptive strike just to be on the safe side.

My own initial response to this is merely;

“Crazy Madman? Have you seen who’s running America lately?”

Really the crazy madman riff is a but a familiar trope that’s often trotted out in these International bunfights. Such sledging is just the standard stock-in-trade psy-ops propaganda dished out by Deep State Apparatchiks, Murdoch Media Mouthpieces and Cricket Fans everywhere.

In the Neo Con world view, just as every Welfare recipient is a bludger, every Environmentalist is an extremist, so every non-aligned Head of State is a crazy dictator who wants to rule the World and ravishes virgins every single morning before breakfast with their reportedly under-size and defective organ.*

(*authors note; As a fan of the CIA’s “Dark Arts Division”, I really appreciate the subtle brilliance of this type of of Psy-Opdouble-think propaganda“; simultaneously accusing “the Enemy” of both Sexual Inadequacy

and of Predatory Sexual Behaviour. A classic ploy, such sexual-slurring was engaged against Colonel Gaddafi, Hitler and Saddam Hussein amongst others.

You’d think one thing would cancel the other out, but this apparent contradiction creates a subtle sense of Cognitive Dissonance in the Viewing/Reading Public, which can then only be relieved by the sadistic sexual titillation gained from watching “the Enemy’s” Presidential palace being bombed by a squadron of Tom Cruise look-a-likes while the fallen dictator, naked and bleeding, is hunted like a rat through the city’s sewer system.) Narcissism, sadism, voyeurism, this sort of propaganda meme has it all and has been a popular motif since the time of Julius Caesar.

Colonel Gaddafi’s last sewer

Oh I’m not an apologist for Kim Jong Un! (the only fat man in his kingdom) I’m sure we wouldn’t get on at all and he does indeed appear to run an authoritarian State which habitually, ruthlessly crushes the slightest shadow of dissidence or even discontent.

But to call him a madman is unkind, and more importantly, inaccurate. For one thing Lunatics generally tend to have poor grooming and a dishevelled appearance, while the beloved Leader is always immaculately turned out. He is, in fact, much more likely to be a very sharp, clear-headed operator with a pragmatic grasp of the Facts, just like his father, and his father before him. The Kim family has run North Korea for over 60 years with no serious internal threat to their rule. Historically speaking, he reigns of madmen don’t tend to that sort of longetivity.

He also seems to have a sense of humour, but I suspect that like Stalin, he’s the sort of Joker that finds poisoning the guests’ soup an amusing jest. (True the survivors laughed, but Stalin could tell their hearts weren’t in it and had them shot for being miserable killjoys. It is perhaps a type of humour that is best appreciated by other despots.)

Paranoid is a description often applied to North Korea’s Leadership, Society and it’s People, and I must say, the Koreans have every right and reason to be paranoid and if I was North Korean I’d be paranoid too.

The Americans utterly devastated that country during the Korean War; every building, every village, every footbridge became a legitimate target for the American war machine. They were bombed into the Stone Age, every town completely devastated, and lived in tunnels and mud-huts, moving around only at night. Eventually there was an armistice, but not a Peace Treaty, so technically the Korean War is still going and shooting could resume at any moment. Meanwhile the Koreans have had the world’s largest military Super Power parked on their border for the last seventy years or so, pointing artillery in their direction, and conducting regular naval “exercises” off their shore-line.

So, yeah..if any of my readers doubts the North Korean’s right to be suspicious of American intentions, please take twenty minutes or so to google up the Korean War and then get back to me.

Yeah we made North Korea what it is. (By “We” of course I mean, the “WEST”, America and Friends, “The Gang of Five” et al.)The West has created a perfect environment for a military dictatorship to thrive and flourish as a result of their intervention in the Korean Peninsula since 1950.

The constant military threat parked on North Korea’s doorstep, combined with the all too recent memories of the horrors of the American bombing campaign, has naturally resulted in a Society that feels itself under seige, forever just one step from being on an active war footing again. In such an environment it makes sense to rely on a military style government run by a series of autocratic “strong man”.

Workers, farmers and soldiers unite under a portrait of Dear Leader in Kaesong.

But don’t worry folks! This is all just political theatre, pure Hollywood spectacle for the proles. The Americans are not going to wipe out their favourite “Bad Actor” any time soon (and China’s not going to give up its useful tool). North Korea is the perfect villain, an alien external threat you can rely on anytime you need a foreign hate figure to beat on and give yourself a little lift in the polls for looking Statesmanlike. They’re just big enough to be a bit scary, but not big enough to be a real threat. Syria might be the media’s favourite bad boy this week, but have no fear North Korea will be back next week. More threats, statements, tweets, declarations and bellicose bombast will be uttered.

It’s all just Punch and Judy really.

Be back next week!



The Reverend Hellfire is a practised Performance Poet,

President of the Kurilpa Institute of Creativity Inc., and an Ordained Minister of the Church of Spiritual Humanists AND

the Church of the Universe.

No-one who’s done you wrong

will ever forgive you for it.



~ by reverendhellfire on April 15, 2018.

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