As the day dawned,

and the fire front advanced,

Locals were overcome by a strong sense of trepidation,

fanned by strong winds

and constant Media coverage.

Their forebodings proved to be not without foundation.

For, soon after, a fleet of army vehicles

packed with media advisers

and four wheeled drives with blacked out windows

roared into town in convoy,

announcing, alas, the arrival

not of much needed water

/petrol/food/ or medical supplies,

but of a smirking Prime Minister

keen for an informal chat, and

impromptu photo opportunity

whilst comforting the Afflicted.

Alas, ten minutes later, the convoy was beating

a strategic retreat as a jeering mob of the afflicted

drove the PM from the town.

The Media (circling like sharks) asked later

if that was blood they could smell in the water?

But the PM insisted he was undamaged by the Incident.

“It’s not my job to take anger personally,”demurred

the country’s first “Limited Liability” Prime Minister,

“my response to the Bushfire Disaster and the peoples suffering

is entirely appropriate and commensurate with

the Highest Principles of Corporate Responsibility!

Goodness me! If Australia was a Bank and I was the CEO

I’d be getting a big Pay Bonus right about now!”

Meanwhile, Party Spin Doctors & Fixers

were rounding up Party supporters

in the Tri-Shire area to ensure the PM

received an spontaneously enthusiastic response

from a grateful & adoring Public

at a string of carefully choreographed photo-opportunities.

Alas, later in the afternoon

he became the first Prime Minister

to Spontaneously Combust whilst in office,

when a stray ember from a nearby fire-front

set him alight as he was Gaslighting

at a Press Conference.

“He’d just begun to blame trees for starting fires

when up he went!” noted a journalist who witnessed

the prime ministerial immolation.

“It’s a Tragedy really..we could have saved him

if his pockets hadn’t been stuffed full of coal.”



To read the Reverend Hellfire’s traditional Australia/Invasion/Survival Day Poem go to..


It still stands.



The Reverend Hellfire is a practised Performance Poet,

an Ordained Minister of the Church of Spiritual Humanism

and in general Pretty Hot Stuff all around.


~ by reverendhellfire on January 26, 2020.

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